Monday, December 13, 2010

Freakonomics Guys Drop Some Science

Yeah, Yeah... quit rubbing it in.
Look Freakonomics guys, lay off. We're doing the best we can. We're underfunded, understaffed and our intern is a relentlessly upbeat Cankdeska Cikana Community College sophomore who won't quit it with the North Dakota fun facts. Like did you know North Dakota grows more sunflowers than any other state? Do you know how hard it is to work with that kind of energy around? To make matters worse, our office is located in an abandoned Urban Outfitters. It's still full of creepy anorexic manikins in shabbily made clothes for teenagers who can't be bothered to dress like crap on their own. We lose a lot of afternoon staging elaborate reenactments of Civil War battles as fought by slacker emo kids - no one ever gets shot, but by the end the North has unfriended the South.

And frankly we're out numbered and being overrun by the flammable, the damnable and the toxic. We're knee deep in crazy around here. It's not easy keeping up, and morale is getting low. But we'll keep plugging away despite your petty criticisms and scurrilous attacks. If you care so deeply then get a matchbook and get to work. It's not like this isn't a highly flammable era; we honestly can't account for the dip in fire related deaths. It's not as if Columbia University professors are being charged with incest for having three year relationships with their adult children. Did we mention the creepy father/daughter sexting? We didn't did we? Now do you see what we're up against.

Yeah, this guy. Sweet Dreams.

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